Season 4, Semis 2nd Leg

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

The winners of each contest will face each other in the ELL Finals for the championship. Let's see who that will be.

Shwe vs Chavez
Than Shwe leads Myanmar, a.k.a. the country formerly known as Burma. The United Nations is determined to iron out an agreement with Shwe. Shwe is determined to iron out the face of opposition leader Aung San Suu Kyi. The military junta-tarian is also considering following in the footsteps of Bengals Wide Receiver Chad Johnson by changing his name to "Greater Than Shwe" because it would piss off Head Coach Marvin Lewis.

Hugo Chavez is not only the president of Venezuela, he's also a painter. His last painting sold for $250,000 and was bought by the triumvirate of Sean Penn, Danny Glover, and Cindy Sheehan. Chavez also received a letter from the ailing Fidel Castro. The letter read in part, "Dear Hugo, Please don't get shot. I like butterflies. Sometim... fjgksolftrldkfgkldklgggggggggggggggg." Apparently, old Strokey McCastro had a relapse in the middle of dictating the letter.
winner 2nd leg: Shwe by 7
winner overall: Shwe by 18

al-Bashir vs Kim
Omar al-Bashir runs Sudan for now. He also runs the genocide in Darfur. Recently, Holocaust scholars have come out against him. The last person Holocaust scholars publicly condemned had a funny little mustache and liked to yell things in German. Of course, I'm referring to David Hasselhoff back in college. So, this is not a good sign for al-Bashir. Kim Jong-Il will head North Korea as long as he stays alive. Both the United States and South Korea do not possess a strategy for a post-Kim North Korea. That means that they hope he lives and stays in power. When your most ardent enemies want you to stay in power, you've lost your evil edge. Kim is like a porn star with ED. A sad sight indeed.
winner 2nd leg: al-Bashir by 30
winner overall: al-Bashir by 40

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