Season 5, Semis 2nd Leg

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The ELL's Final Four is about to be history. Let's see who will advance to the championship series.

Kim vs Shwe
Kim Jong-Il, the man in North Korea, has accused to U.S. reporters of spying, which is evil because they're not Sean Hannity or Glenn Beck. This comes in the shadow of North Korea's potential test rocket launch. Kim seems to take his foreign policy directives from watching old Marvin the Martian cartoons. Marvin also inspires the little autocrat's wardrobe. Burma's military junta leader looks a lot like Myanmar's military junta leader. Both go by the name of Than Shwe. During the one speech a year Shwe gives, he called for democracy in 2010. Don't get too heartened, the leader says that "every individual has a right to express their political freedoms unless they're not named Than Shwe." Even Chad Ocho Cinco has sent his application to Yangon for a name change.
winner 2nd leg: Kim by 3
winner overall: Kim by 5

al-Bashir vs al-Assad
Omar al-Bashir, the ruler of Sudan, is the new unifying personality among Arabs. The only thing Arab leaders can agree on is that al-Bashir should not be imprisoned in the wake of an ICC indictment on charges of genocide in Darfur because "he's too dainty to go to prison." The King of Jordan, Abdullah II said, "Omar al-Bashir has such pretty lips. He wouldn't last a day." Syrian President Bashar al-Assad has promised al-Bashir that the Sudanese ruler can stay in al-Assad's attic if the ICC comes for Omar, "like what happened with Ann Frank, even though that whole thing is a lie." That brings up an age old question: Who's more evil, the evil guy or the guy helping the evil guy?
winner 2nd leg: al-Assad by 11
winner overall: al-Bashir by 3

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